Dying & Loss, Need Or Trial

Find Me Lord – Ted Loder

Oh, Eternal One,

it would be easier for me to pray

if I were clear and of a single mind and a pure heart;

if I could be done hiding from myself and from you, even in my prayers.


But, I am who I am,

mixture of motives and excuses,

blur of memories, quiver of hopes,

knot of fear, tangle of confusion,

and restless with love, for love.


I wander somewhere between gratitude and grievance,

wonder and routine, high resolve and undone dreams,

generous impulses and unpaid bills.


Come, find me, Lord.

Be with me exactly as I am.

Help me find me, Lord. Help me accept what I am,

so I can begin to be yours.


Make of me something small enough to snuggle,

young enough to question, simple enough to giggle,

old enough to forget, foolish enough to act for peace,

skeptical enough to doubt the sufficiency of anything but you,

and attentive enough to listen

as you call me out of the tomb of my timidity

into the chancy glory of my possibilities

and the power of your presence.




  • From Ted Loder’s beautiful book
  • “Guerrillas of Grace: Prayers For The Battle’ ISBN 0806690542
  • Ted Loder can be found at tedloder.blogspot.com.au
  • Submitted by Rob